15 Things NOT To Say On A Dive Boat

15 Things NOT To Say On A Dive Boat

How many of the following have you heard on the dive boat?  Most of these should probably not be said, either!  :D

  1. Can you hold my goggles while I put on my flippers and put my yellow thing in this clip?
  2. Could you ‘warm up’ my wetsuit for me?
  3. I forgot, which is the left and right fin again?
  4. Is that your mask under my tank?
  5. (after arriving at the dive site) Can we go back? I forgot my dive gear.Scuba Diving in Cape Town
  6. Can someone lend me a computer? Mine keeps flashing ‘Deco Violation’?
  7. I don’t need a buddy if I run out of air, I can hold my breath all the way to the surface.
  8. I use a lot of air when diving, so I’m gonna need to borrow some of yours to max out my bottom time.
  9. If you run out of air, just use the yellow one.
  10. Sorry, I just vomited in the boat.
  11. Is there a rescue diver on this boat? I seem to always need one.
  12. Buddy? Oh, did I go down with a buddy?
  13. I count seven, are you SURE there are eight names on the manifest?
  14. My tank’s empty, but don’t worry, I don’t think too much water got in.
  15. This doesn’t look like the boat I came out on (especially for Long John Silver :D )

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