Scuba diving is a serious sport and you need to know how to handle lots of different situations, should they ever arise. This comes through proper training, experience and lots and lots of diving. But diving is not always serious – we have a lot of laughs diving and often because of funny things that we or our buddies do. We chatted to some of our regular divers to find out about some of their funnier scuba diving moments….
Here are some of the more memorable ones (names have been withheld to avoid embarrassment)
Pulling my wife down on a dive with strong surface currents and getting to the bottom with the wrong wife. I was wondering why she was struggling so.
Watching cleaner fish entering the dive master’s mouth, cleaning his teeth and then trying to squeeze into his ear!
Well, it wasn’t funny to me, but everyone else shrieks over it … I was diving in southern Mozambique and inspecting one of those big anemones for the transparent shrimps when.. Nemo bit me! on the cheek! It was jolly sore (and made a fantastic subcutaneous bruise rather like a love bite, which prompted more than my share of interested looks in the following days) .. I looked up, clutching my cheek, and saw the dive master, the heartless bastard, laughing so much I thought (okay hoped) he might drown from it. those clownfish are scary!
Absentmindedly diving head first off the back of a moving live aboard, fully kitted out, not wanting to be left behind by my dive group, who had already left.
My funniest moment was when a seal came closer and greeted me during a night dive at Simons Town. Words will never be able to express my thoughts and the feeling of relief afterwards when I realised it was just a seal – it was as funny as hell!
I slipped on the rocks while doing a shore entry in Simon’s Town and luckily landed flat on my bum…but couldn’t get up again.
I got chased by a Scorpion fish in Thailand. Not at all funny when it happened, but hilarious in hindsight. I think I got too close to the animal while I was filming it with my GoPro. It must have gotten aggravated and started chasing me. I’ve never swam so fast in my life… Eventually the fish gave up the chase, and I lost the group, so had to surface, find the buoy, and descend again. Needless to say, I was basically out of air after that brief stint with Mr Scorpion.
After one dive I went to help our Skipper at the slipway with the boat… There I did my first slipway dive!! I slipped and felt straight on my back… 10/10 for effort…everything(from top to toe) was covered in green slime!
Forgetting to inflate my BC on a shore entry and being knocked over by waves. Needed to be rescued by my dive buddy. All I hear today is him teasing me with the words “whats red and rolls in the waves and cries for help”.
Whilst in the navy, I was diving somewhere off the Mozambique coast to see what was wrong with the submarine’s rudder. We were at sea for 2 weeks and had very little exercise so I couldn’t get back onto the stern of the sub which they called the ducks arse. There was a heavy swell and every time I got close, the swell lifted the stern and I had to get away quickly because when it comes down again it will crush you. The officer on the deck saw that I was tired and getting into trouble. He shouted at the shark sentries to fire a couple of shots behind me (at a shark which was not there). I was on board in 5 seconds!!
I was still doing my dive training in PE and the visibility was so bad on our wreck dive, I only saw the wreck when I swam straight into it!
Doing buddy breathing with my buddy on my back, trying to extend his bottom time and signalling to everyone we are ok!! Had some strange looks under water! (yes he was sucking air while I was only starting to use air!).
Diving is a lot of fun…. do you have any funny diving stories to share with us?